Day Twenty: Hindsight

I don’t have a lot of spare time right now since I began volunteering this week in addition to my usual writing jobs and then this blog.  More than that, though, is that I don’t have a lot of room in my mind this week.  I got into some trouble and I’m trying to dig myself out.  I will be happy to share as soon as it’s over, but that’s a few days still and I’m holding my breath until then.

I wrote this a few weeks ago for a friend of my sister.  She messaged me, asking a random question for a very serious topic – it was such a lighthearted ask and it sincerely confused me where she was coming from asking for serious answers in such a nonchalant manner.  Maybe I could learn a thing or two from that kind of an attitude.  Approach dark and light situations in the same neutral tone.  This is the purpose of this 100-day dedication to meditation.  I want to embrace the solitude of oneness and to not veer off course with every excitable or banal moment, treating them all with openness and also transparency.  In one ear and out the other, as they say.

Well, here is what I said (well first what she said):

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Well, I have to admit that you question is confusing to me.  I don’t exactly understand what ‘delusion’ means in this instance, or really at all.  It is apparently synonymous with ‘illusion’ but the ‘de-‘ prefix implies that the state of being referred to is ‘un-illusioned’.  Either way, these words don’t mean very much to me.  The concept of sanity is relative and we all have our places in this existence with our varying positions.  There is a reason why each of us is here and that reason is directly proportional to our collective position.  I believe that prior to our incarnation on this planet, and with each subsequent day, we all choose where to position ourselves, and as such, we need to be able to imagine – or foster a creative illusion, if I may – to be able to create and act.  Those who are deemed ‘sane’ by society are safe from change.  They choose not to act, thus are part of the stabilizing element of our collective.  In the same way, those who act out of turn, independently moving in a random direction of their choosing, are still elements of the collective and are the catalyst for the change of the whole, whether good or bad is a gamble. 

This is why delusion/illusion have negative connotations.  Our acts of choosing can be used for good or bad, so the stabilizing element of our collective would rather not take the chance of change and typically prefers to remain the same.  Therefore, if we were to listen to them, we would effect less change as a collective.  Except that there are rogue elements who do not listen to the ‘sane’ side of our collective and continue to do what they want.  These catalytic elements will continue to do it’s own bidding, and if it appears appetizing enough to the swing states, will grow like a cancer. 

This is where our collective is at right now: sick with cancer.  We can fight it, just like we can fight disease in our own individual bodies.  We who want our collective to heal have more power than the stabilizing element of our collective is willing to acknowledge.  They have been convinced that it’s not worth the fight and if we just hide under the covers that the bad elements will go away.  I believe that all it would take is for the good element of illusion to show up – to dream up a better world by finding better ways to connect.  I already feel the connection, but even I am subject to the inherently bad feelings we get when seeing others connect, as per the rogue elements’ effect on our collective.  We look at real healing and connection as fake and ridiculously contrived, like the new age weirdos who talk about one love and receiving messages from elsewhere.  I can’t help that feeling and I think that we’ve been conditioned by the destabilizing elements of our collective to have that gutteral reaction, because sickness grows more easily in a destabilized environment. 

I know that connection is real and I’ll be proud to be a part of the good element that puts my hand up and is present – that will be the true stabilizing factor which we need right now in our collective.  The ‘sane’ people are just one of the elements of what our collective needs for balance, so that we understand what we really are and can grow from coming together as a whole.  None of us is better or more important than the other.  Never let yourself be belittled, but always endeavor to understand the cause of the belittling by searching within yourself; because we are all one, we never have to look any further for the answers to what is wrong with our collective than within our individual selves.

***

Well well well… three holes in the ground.

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